but you dont have a clue...

So this weeks flown by. with my reversed sleep schedual its been reeking havoc on my bodys system but im surviving.im also sore from all the extra exersize ive been getting running for papers and stuff. anyways thats all good, as work continues im starting to get the routines down and its getting better and i like my job so i think ill stay! hopefully they like me too!

rehersal has been falling apart. i feel like im in the middle of a family fude war and i dont wanna be there. i want to fix everything and get shit done so we can put this damn play on. alot of people are making this about them and not focusing on the main goal and are gooffing off instead of trying to learn. its a pain. but im working on it. hopefully this weeks practices will be better. im begging for it to be

as my life gets better, my brain is falling apart. i feel like im going insane some days. its all falling apart in there nad im not sure what kind of resuce teem needs to opperate on it. but i think ill survive. i just need to get sleep i guess. things will continue to develope hopefully in a well natured manor and we can all funtion. my birthday is coming up in a week and im not sure what i want to do for it. i might go out, i might go out of town or i might just sit in my basement and watch movies..lol. who knows what this year will bring and another year of life. that should be fun since im right between the fun ages. meh. i think ill survive...or at least i hope so.

my mother is finally going to the head clinic this wensday, so thats disapointing on the fact that she probably wont be there for my birthday. the simple fact is shes getting the help she needs so we can have our mom back instead of the invalid we live with now. yay for getting better!!!

my music has been taking over my life lately and im glad of it. its been helping me pull through this rough time and id just like to thank it for exsiting. then again...well thats a fun story for another time... meh.

for some reason my life has decided that even though things are going great im gonna be depressed and have odd mood swings. i love my random body changes. probably just means i should learn to tame my insomnia and beat it into submision so i can function..lol...

as an update on that girl i mentioned earlier. things are going swimingly with her. shes been suporting me and that means alot to me. somedays im not sure what i would do without someone to help me sort through the mess in my head. though i feel bad burdening people with my problems. sooo...yeah bad guilty concious for me. but were going to a party and i want that to go well. it will be nice to just relax for a bit.


im greatful for the wonderful oppertunitys life has thrown my way lately and for all the new people ive meet and all the great places and things ive gotten to do.

now lets go out there and kick ass and get this shit done right!!! lol.

i know, random much, but you guys still love me some how.so keep up your wonderful selfs. thanks.


loves, Misery